One of the benefits of being on my own is that I am not answerable to anyone and can spend my money how I choose. So January found me sunning myself in the Caribbean with BFF (Best Female Friend). We stayed at an all inclusive and really did our best to do as little as possible – lots of reading, lots of music, lots of cocktails and lots of laughter! It was however also a poignant trip for me, as it was here that EH (Ex Husband) and I married 25 years ago.
The two things we did do to drag ourselves off our loungers was a round the island boat trip. We had deliberated long and hard over whether to go or not. I have been on too many booze cruises in my lifetime and find them horrendous! Jolly Roger pirate ships with all you can drink rum punch and lots of puking. Not at my age darling!
Also BFF wouldn’t mind my saying she is a bit of a wimp. When she was told we would have to sail along the Atlantic coastline for half an hour and it can be a bit rough, she was pretty nervous. But we decided we needed to do something. And what a blast we had! The stunning catamaran took 100 people but on our voyage only had about 40 passengers. So plenty of room to relax, sunbathe and enjoy the fabulous food. There was alcohol but we were very reserved. And the Atlantic section of our ‘voyage’? Well, it was very hairy with big waves – rather like riding a mammoth roller coaster. And bit of a wimp BFF? She loved it!
We also booked a driver to take us around to various sights around the island. I decided to take BFF to where I had got married. However the driver told us the venue was closed for refurbishment (we married at the top of an old sugar mill). As we drove past, sure enough there were signs up saying it was closed – but the gates were open and we decided to drive in. It was completely deserted which was quite fitting really as had it been full of lively and boisterous people it would have been strange. As it was I climbed the stairs on my own – remembering the last time when it literally was the happiest day of my life. Of course I stood there and had a little weep before BFF came to join me and give me a hug. I am so glad I went there. It wouldn’t have been right to visit the island without going to see it and it helped me to move on again.
We made friends with a couple of hilarious feisty women from Wales who were such fun. Cocktail hour became earlier and earlier each day! Now I am a girl who loves my pampering and when one of the Welsh women recommended one of the masseurs on the beach I was very keen. He knew we were a bunch of single women and told us he himself was divorced and seemed nice and chatty enough.
The massage started really well and he was pretty good. I had agreed half an hour back and neck massage and after half an hour he asked me to turn over and whispered that I was special and he would give me extra treatment. With that he brushed the sand off my feet and I thought “yay foot rub – my favourite”. But as he massaged my legs I wondered what was in store. I had a right to feel worried as my inner thighs received a great deal of attention. Who would have thought I carried so much tension in that area! But who would have thought a feisty girl like me – never backward in coming forward – would just freeze. And that’s exactly what I did. I lay there absolutely rigid with fear and just willed the whole experience to be over.
I couldn’t get back to my sunbed quick enough and when BFF asked me how my massage was, I burst into tears! And after she grabbed me a strong G&T, I told her my sorry tale. It may well be that some (single) women like his extra attention. To say I felt violated, felt like too strong a word but I certainly felt his behaviour was beyond intrusive and highly inappropriate. However as he was not employed by the hotel I didn’t know what I could do. With only 3 days left of the holiday, I decided to just let it go. The woman who recommended him was mortified – she had had 3 massages during her stay and never had any problems.
It didn’t spoil my holiday as overall we had the most amazing time. It was a great way to start the year and escape the grey.