Having read BackPacking Granny’s recent post, Caring, Taking an Interest and Just Listening is very Helpful, it got me thinking. When I stopped and actually thought about my friends I realised that an incredible number of them are suffering at the moment. Like BackPacking Granny, I want to make all of my friends and family enjoy happiness and good health. However it is not always possible. BPG and I often talk on the phone. We chat about what we can do for a particular person who is currently top of our list of people who need some TLC and more.
I have many friends who are either ill themselves or who are caring for a sick member of their family. Also I have friends who are going through a divorce or are struggling with ex-partners who are not ‘cutting the mustard’ either financially or with children. Then there are friends who have financial worries because they are on their own or have lost a source of income.
Of course, given my friends’ ages there are many caring for elderly parents. This involves accompanying them to hospital appointments, visiting them when they have to remain in hospital. A friend called me this morning as she was rushing to a hospital where her mother had been taken. Her mother was suffering from a broken hip. So my friend was juggling meetings, trying not to let anyone down. Meanwhile her husband’s mother is extremely ill in a home and she is visiting her as often as she can.
So that brings me onto those that are carrying all of these burdens and are trying to cope and smile through it all. I worry about these carers. They often get forgotten and yet they too are on their knees with tiredness and stress.
“Your burden of life becomes much heavier when there is no one around you to appreciate how heavy the burden you carry!”Mehmet Murat ildan
So it seems that at the moment there are too many people carrying too many worries on their shoulders. We, as women, do take on a lot of life’s burden – it is part of our make-up. I regard staying healthy as my own personal ambition. I am no longer worrying about whether I can fit into a size 10 pair of jeans. Nor am I moaning about the additional wrinkles I have spotted. No my priority is staying healthy and living longer. Then, I can say if I am hit by illness that I did my best to avoid it. Also if I am fit I have a better chance of fighting the illness. Overall it is happiness and good health that I wish for.
This morning I listened on BBC Radio4 to a mother who has had to sell her house to pay for medical marijuana for her daughter who suffers from epilepsy. It costs £2000 per month and due to lack of government funding she cannot get her prescription paid for by the NHS. Can you imagine the stress and grief that one woman is going through and yet I am sure she comes across people during her day that have no idea what burden she is carrying.
Recently I witnessed two pedestrians having a rant at a woman driver. They thought she had parked in an illegal space. In actual fact they were wrong. However they walked on feeling smug that they had done some good, righted a wrong. Meanwhile the lady in question just sobbed at the wheel of her car. I saw this and went up to speak to her. I discovered she had just heard some devastating news. Parking her car correctly was therefore not at the forefront of her mind.
We all need to be more understanding and not so judgemental. I have done it myself when someone has pulled out in front of me forcing me to brake. Now instead of hitting the horn I am going to think, maybe that person has a lot of problems on their mind.
When people ask me how my family are doing I answer that they are all enjoying happiness and good health. Meanwhile I acknowledge to myself that I am very lucky. This moment may not last forever but I am enjoying it as who knows what is around the corner.
Embrace the now as you do not know what the future has in store for you.
Life is not shiny and perfect. Everybody is not nailing it even if their social media feed looks like they have a perfect life.
As I now hear on the news that bad weather is on its way however it is gorgeous today. I am going to grab this opportunity and drive to my favourite walking spot and for a long dog walk. Tomorrow we may be house-bound with wind and rain!
My mantra, for as long as I am able, is going to be – just enjoy my friends and family (& dogs). I want to spend as much time with them as possible and help them when needed.
The power of women is incredible when women come together so get together with your girlfriends as often as you can.