It may (or may not!) come as a surprise that older people are continuing to enjoy an active sex life well into their eighties. According to research from The University of Manchester, more than half of men and almost a third of women over 70 reported they were still sexually active, with a third of these men and women having frequent sex – meaning at least twice a month. So it seems you’re never too old to have sex.
A National Council on Aging survey reported that 70% of people in their sixties who have regular intercourse find their sex lives more satisfying than when they were in their forties. Sex after age 65 may take place less often, but many women find increased sexual pleasure after menopause, including more frequent or more intense orgasms.
Studies have found that older adults who have more sex have better memories. Sex also increases emotional connection – and people with emotional connections live longer.
Once a woman is past menopause and no chance of pregnancy, many couples find it easier to relax and look forward to lovemaking. And partners who are retired or working only part time often have more time and energy for each other.
Most of us aren’t going to be able to do the Kama Sutra positions any more but exercises that help with flexibility (yoga is a good one) really help.
Sex can be physically demanding putting stress on your hips, knees, or back. Try positions that utilise larger muscle groups, like missionary, spooning, and doggie style.
By midlife, you know your own body and your partner’s intimately, and, hopefully, you’ve figured out how to communicate what you find pleasurable. It’s likely that you’ve shed any sexual inhibitions, and your sexual confidence and experience probably result in better sex for both of you.
Be intimate at different times of the day. Try sex before dinner and then eat – it completely changes the vibe of the meal.
And if you have a new sexual partner, body image can be a worry. Gravity means that parts flop that we’d rather stay put. Things hang lower than expected. Keep in mind that they probably have a few unwanted jiggles, too. Perhaps use candles and dim the lights. If you’re not comfortable undressing in front of a new partner, get into bed before them.
Not everyone has a significant other. Sex toys often open up a whole new world to women, keeping vaginal tissues moist and elastic & boosting hormone levels. Orgasms are good for you!
Sex keeps you young by releasing a surge of plethora chemicals into your body which keep bones and muscles healthy and skin looking plump and youthful.
Making love keeps you healthy by releasing an antibody called immunoglobulin that protects us from infections.
During sex oxytocin is released when the body climaxes – aches, pains and headaches often disappear after sex.
Making love also lowers blood pressure, reduces stress, cuts the risk of a fatal heart attack by half for men, boosts self esteem, improves intimacy, and helps keep the pelvic floor muscles healthy decreasing the chances of incontinence in later life.
Regular sex relieves tension making you more relaxed, less depressed and helping you to sleep better. It also helps the brain to produce serotonin, the mood lifting chemical found in antidepressants.
Now that’s a pretty impressive list of benefits. So, if you are able, it seems we should definitely make time (however tired, stressed, podgy or grumpy we are feeling) for a healthy bit of sex over 50…
Annabel and I have recorded a lighthearted podcast on the subject of You’re Never Too Old To Have Good Sex. Why not have a listen now?
This website has lots more wellbeing articles on a multitude of subjects